About Me

My photo
Ontario, Canada
Shut up. You're wrong.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Why You and I Aren't Popular


Now if you've ever read any of my posts before, you undoubtedly know that I'm not popular in the slightest. I'm someone who can't help but to notice the bullshit we blissfully try to ignore and at times can annoy people with my theories on society.

One thing that bugs me is the thought of social hierarchy. Generally portrayed in American media, movies and television shows is the thought of "the perfect family." This image has differed greatly over the decades though. In the 1950's well through to the late sixties was the picture perfect house with a white picket fence and a family safely secured within their abode. Of course the people who lived inside were generally nice people. There was a mother, a father, a daughter and a son. Oh did I mention that they hate a cute little puppy? Yes this is our typical family. The mom was the caregiver, the housewife and the nurturer. The dad, he was the provider, he was the little league football coach, he was the man who bought you you're first car. Now the daughter, she was the one who was daddies little girl, she was the cheerleader, she looked up to her dad and admired her mom. Lastly there was the son. Not particularly bright, but he was a good kid. He was the guy who won the state championship with that 35 yard pass in the end zone.

Now I personally can't relate to the American school life, but since many of us here in Canada are affected or at least think they're affected by the American life. It's (Canadian school life,) still rich with the social hierarchy. See at my school he have no football team, and we have no cheerleaders. The students on our hockey team, on our basketball team and so on are slightly noticed, slightly more popular but are not put on a pedestal by the majority. It's the kids who think that they're on a pedestal that are the popular ones. These are the kids that hang out with older people and think that by association they themselves are somehow better for the experience. Regardless there are still people who realize that that they're essentially worthless. I don't admire, but I don't hate them either. My only thing to really say for them is that they're attention whores in denial. Bottom feeders like the rest of us who intentionally drowned and floated to the top just to be noticed by us, they're underlings. I'm not popular, I'm not particularly outgoing. I'm literally just there. Sitting and waiting just so I can bitch about the fact that I'll have to board the bus and do it all over again in about sixteen hours. I don't fit into any category really. I'm really not into the arts, I'm definitely not into plays, I've never tried out for a sports team, I've never tried to please the masses by running for student government and I sure haven't tried to be academically superior.

Our problem is that we are all bred for one of two purposes.

  • Half of us are meant to please those who have what we want. These are the children that will run our schools with their looks or their sporting achievements. They might be nice people. They could be open minded and thoughtful. Unfortunately the select few are overshadowed by the stereotype that their peers have presented for the rest of us who wonder where we stand in this race. These people are taught to strive for attention. These are the ones who are admired yet hated. Think about the picture at the top.
  • Then there is the second group. These are the kids who are taught to use their minds. To study and to look for different things in the game we call life. They look for relevancy and are not particularly interested in most conforming activities. These are the brains behind the scenes. These same kids who were persecuted for their ideals will soon be the providers. They'll eventually marry the cheerleader who made fun of them in school. These are the same people who will one day make their bosses look like pure geniuses.
Do you see the where this whole mess intertwines yet? Society is thought to have a set rule. You either accept it without thought, or you try to make one last attempt to enrich it. Overall, both parties have their flaws.

I guarantee that if you try to achieve the latter, you will inevitably fail but you can certainly cause a disturbance. Rosa Parks, Dr. King, Abraham Lincoln... these were people who shook society. Did they succeed and eradicate all of our problems? No, but they MADE us think. They MADE us progress as people and they helped us to relate and possibly understand the simplicity of what we really are.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Arkells


Yeah I know right... what in the hell are "Arkells?"

The Arkells are this really amazing alt rock band. I'm serious people, check these guys out. Every song is great, catchy... sometimes they even induce projectile vomiting from their immense awesomeness.
If you're not searching Youtube for them yet then I don't know what else I can say to convince you.

As for their sound, it can best be described as if the two bands, illScarlett and Tokyo Police Club got bored one day and thought, "Ugh, Two and a Half Men is a re-run... let us produce pure awesomeness from our loins."
And with that folks, an amazing band was created.

To quote a very well respected man known as The Sex Dragon, "check out this band or I might just steal your dog. Just kidding, but I will give you a menacing look."
I would do what he says, he might just be a crazy sumbitch.

Here's a link to the best song from the Arkells CD, "Jackson Square."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-LDEwHxInRE



Search & Win


Wednesday, May 6, 2009

SKE3T SKE3T... =3

I would like to start off by saying,

Biggie Smalls... Biggie Smalls... Biggie Smalls...


"Swine Flu"
So this little Mexican menace is supposed to be so goddamn deadly? Well I haven't met anybody who has it... have you? No jackass, you haven't. You know why you haven't. Swine flu is like the moon landing. It didn't happen, so move on and continue with your life... oink oink.

Now here is what pisses me off (okay the thing that pisses me off at the moment...) On almost every single YouTube video there is at least one prepubescent nine year old boy from somewhere in California who decides to be a "rebel," by posting this little statement,

lizzysk8er (3 hours ago)

Marked as spam
u say Flo Rida i say OZZY
u say miley cyrus i say kill her

u say katy perry i say fuck her

u say high school musical i say kill them all

u say rap i say SUCK IT!

u say hip hop i say slipknot

u say kanye west i say cradle of filth

u say T. Pain i say ha! your in jail

say Akon i say trivium
94% of kids prefer rap to other music. :-P if your one of the awesome 6% that still loves to headbang copy and paste this to three pure rock videos.

Wow goddamnit, I have no idea why this pisses me off so much (because I'm slowly becoming insane?) but every time I see it I want to punch LiL Wayne in the liver...

We all know that Slipknot is a good band, but come on dumbass, you make every Slipknot, Disturbed, Bring Me the Horizon, All That Remains and any other band that you mention look slightly well... retarded.



In Conclusion:

  • I hate most people
  • Swine Flu needs to stop taking it's time
  • 99% of people are idiots who can't be creative and feel the need to post false statistics on YouTube to compensate for an over sized ego and by doing so make me want to punch myself (... and your dog... just kidding PETA,) in the eye just so I don't need to keep looking at your statement or this run-on sentence... so if you're in the 1% of people who can think for themselves (by the way, stop that immediately,) then please promise to never, ever post one of those lame comments.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

'D' is for Douchebag


So as I walked through our school cafeteria today, I notice this kid. He was sitting alone eating a sandwich. All seemed well until the little bastard looks me dead in the eyes and... well the little cuntsack just fucking unloads the grossest, most Hitleresque sneeze that I've ever seen. Honest to Buddha, a piece of chicken shot past my head... needless to say, I plan to press charges on the grounds that he is a douchebag.

Now the second asshole I've encountered was just plain dumb. Sitting at one of our lovely econo-save excuses for a lunchtable, this dumb bitch (I mean this in the nicest way possible) just sort of creates her own conversation about me... while being about two and a half feet across from me. Apparently I am dumb, debf and blind so that I can't possibly know when a scrote-faced prick decides to talk shit (again, nicest meaning of those words,) about me. I was sort of surprised that there was any sort of conversation to be had about me, due to the fact that I'm about as gossip-worthy as an orange.

Now I really could care less about this awkward encounter, but I'd like to share this as advice to stupid people everywhere who think that they're on a higher pedastal than the rest of us commonfolk, that their opinion really "matters:"

Your opinion really just doesn't matter.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Stupid People (Yep, they still exist)

Stupid people please don't read this. Don't get me wrong, you most likely won't understand this because well... you're stupid.

Now I know we've all encountered them. Stupid people are in our schools, at our places of work, on our buses, and even in our libraries (I know right, like what the fuck???)

Now why exactly do I hate them? Well for as long as I can remember I've always tried to apply myself to be smart, to be diligent, hell I even tried to make sure I could spell my own goddamn name right! Lofty goals... yes I think so too. Over the last year or two though, I've slowly but surely given up. That's right, I've given up on trying to achieve anything on an academic level.

It seems you can try as hard as you want, but in the end there is always going to be some fucking moron who thinks that H2O is a special Pokemon attack. They'll get a few laughs because it's cute... they'll get the same response when they're thirty. Sure it makes me seem like a total asshole... but in case I haven't been clear on that: screw it, think what you want on the subject (but you're still wrong.) I just can't stand the fact that for the majority of us, we'll be forced to slowly conform to the ever growing stupid populous. Words like "migraine" will soon be replaced with "thinkache," people won't have the ability to differentiate between tuna and chicken, and Paris Hilton will still be allowed to live.

Oh and before I end this rant I'd like to say "fuck you" to the Afghan president Hamid Karzai, who has made it legal to allow Shiite men to demand sex from their wives every four days and keep them indoors indefinitely. Are you fucking kidding dude??? This is about the most idiotic thing I've ever heard. You are officially a moron, have fun setting your country back another twenty years douchebag.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

A Lesson (in Dumbassary...)

*This will be random and will most likley offend some twelve year old... I appologize for sincerely not caring*

Hanna Montana sucks.

"Yeah but dude, you're just an untalented waste, who is just jealous of what this person has achieved. You're just jealous because she'll make more money in a month than you will in a lifetime. Damn dude you really suck because you feel the need to write this in a blog rather than doing something productive with your life."

... wow you just read me like a book. You've totally seen that I'm jealous and hateful for no apparent reason... don't get me wrong though, I'll still be that way regardless of these facts.

Lets be real folks, she may be a superstar who is slowly consuming legions of fragile preteen minds, but in all factually her fans hate her as much as I do. They just don't know it yet.

"But dude, why do the fans love her enough to go to her concerts and illegally download her so-called music???"

Oh don't worry, it's totally explainable: THEY'RE STUPID.

"Do you care to elaborate on that?

... No.

"Let's see how other Disney... "stars," have faired:
Lindsay Lohan: ... nuff said.
Jonas Brothers: "Burnin' up"... shut the fuck up...
Demi Lavato: Yeah I know eh, I've never heard a song either.
Hilary Duff: Disney did something right...

But do you know what pisses me off the most??? It's the fact that I've been calling her by a stagename the entire time, and I find it totally acceptable.

"Wow of all things, THAT pisses you off? Just call her Miley Cyrus then!"

I shall not, because I intend to end this post.

In conclusion: Kiss my ass Disney. You're slowly killing me along with global warming, and a suddenly laggy internet connection (let's just say... laggy porn...)