You Defiantly Can't Spell

"lmao, look at this idiot! He can't even spell the title correctly! Trololol."

Fuck you cunt(s.) Learn what irony is. I can definitely spell "definitely." Too bad 88.6% of people cannot. It's not a difficult word. It's simply the word "definite," with an "ly" at the end.

There is no excuse for you morons to spell this word wrong, over and over and over. God damn, you should be shot if you're going to spell it incorrectly and then post it on a forum such as the iTunes review. That is shit that you can't change. Whenever I happen to stumble across a review of an album by a user and I see them write at a second grade level, my dick becomes hard with rage.

Also for those of you who are wondering why I visit the iTunes store when I should clearly be stealing music: I visit the store to sample the music (which is of better quality than that of Youtube uploads.) I then decide whether or not I like the piece, and proceed to find a suitable torrent. It's a very simple process really.

Anyways, back to my rant. I can't believe how many morons can't spell this simple word. Here are some bastardized versions of a simple, English word:

- Defiantly (For fucks sake, that's a different word altogether!!!)
- Deffently (Sound it out dickbag, it doesn't even sound remotely correct.)
- Defintly
- Deffiantly
- Definitly (E! The fucking "E!")
- Defantly (Seriously, when I saw this, I nearly punched my grandmother.)
- Definnitely
- Defentily

Honestly, these are all examples of what stupid people have written. Not just on Facebook or MSN, but I've seen idiots even submit them to teachers in their homework. Jesus Christ you fail.

Now in all fairness, up until grade nine, even I had occasional problems with the word. You know what I did to combat my own idiocy? I LOOKED IN A FUCKING DICTIONARY!

Learn to open a dictionary morons. Hell, you can literally use an internet dictionary. For Christ sakes, if you open Microsoft Word you can even type in "deffently" or whatever retarded way you think its spelled; and it will give you a little red line telling you: "You fucked up the spelling." From there you can highlight your fail, right-click and it will give you the CORRECT spelling. Use it fuckwads. Learn to spell an easy word.

I hate you all.

PS - Happy one month. Unlike the rest, you don't fail.

WTF Post

Why do people do things that are so FUCKING STUPID?

For instance, why do pornstars have Twitter accounts? No one cares what you have to say. Now bang me. Thanks.

Why don't we just assassinate Kim Jong Il? I mean, he's fucking crazy, and everyone hates him. His pansy-ass staff wouldn't do shit afterwards, anyways.

Some dumb bitch in my Marketing class today had an answer to a question. The answer was $48,800 (Forty-eight thousand, eight-hundred.) She literally read it as "four, eight, eight, zero, zero." When the teacher was like "lolwut," she replied that she "wasn't very good at reading out numbers [Sic]."

I consistently have an 80+ average in University level courses (not amazing but well above most of my peers,)... and that is an example of one of my classmates. Man the fucking harpoons.

Now, here's more bullshit that pisses me right the fuck off:

Women flock to the dude that played Edward Cullen... need I say more.

People don't appreciate the show "Whose Line is it Anyway?" like they should. People are fucking stupid.

Fleshlights are too damn expensive in my humble opinion.

People rip on Tiger Woods because he banged Holly Sampson and Joslyn James. Those are too hot and slutty pornstars. I for one, congratulate the man. Needless to say, I'd happily put my penis in both of their vaginas. I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic...

The Ottawa Senators continue to keep Matt Carkner on defence as the playoffs near... good luck morons.

'D' is for Douchebag

So as I walked through our school cafeteria today, I notice this kid. He was sitting alone eating a sandwich. All seemed well until the little bastard looks me dead in the eyes and... well the little cuntsack just fucking unloads the grossest, most Hitleresque sneeze that I've ever seen. Honest to Buddha, a piece of chicken shot past my head... needless to say, I plan to press charges on the grounds that he is a douchebag.

Now the second asshole I've encountered was just plain dumb. Sitting at one of our lovely econo-save excuses for a lunchtable, this dumb bitch (I mean this in the nicest way possible) just sort of creates her own conversation about me... while being about two and a half feet across from me. Apparently I am dumb, debf and blind so that I can't possibly know when a scrote-faced prick decides to talk shit (again, nicest meaning of those words,) about me. I was sort of surprised that there was any sort of conversation to be had about me, due to the fact that I'm about as gossip-worthy as an orange.

Now I really could care less about this awkward encounter, but I'd like to share this as advice to stupid people everywhere who think that they're on a higher pedastal than the rest of us commonfolk, that their opinion really "matters:"

Your opinion really just doesn't matter.