My Head Hurts

So I'm lurking the interwebs, and I see two links. The person who provided them claimed that these were the worst two groups IN THE WORLD. Well, I found this quite hard to believe. I mean look at the shit who is out there already:

-Miley Cyrus
-The Jonas Brothers
-Ke$ha
-Owl City
-Hollywood Undead
-Lady GaGa
-Soulja Boy
-Justin Bieber
-Stereos
-Hedley

Well, we all know there are more, but I'm to lazy to type all of this shit down. Anyways though, let's get back to my story shall we?

So the two links sent me to two groups. One was a girl group called: "Millionaires." Even by the group name I could tell my day was going to take a turn for the worse.

The second group consisted of males (theoretically,) and was called "Brokencyde." Well, the name sounded a bit stupid, but so does "Dropkick Murphy's," or "36 Crazyfists," and they're both pretty good bands.

So as I load the two videos, I instantly notice a few things that they share:

-Both groups look like ridiculous scene/hipster assholes.
-The song names are ridiculously stupid.
-The group names are ridiculously stupid.
-The comments below the video were ridiculously stupid.
-AUTOTUNE, AUTOTUNE and more AUTO-FUCKING-TUNAGE.


After watching about one minute of each video, I instantly felt the need to smash my laptop against my wall. However I soon realized that I love her, and decided to cry into a pillow instead.

These videos should be enough to either convert you to good music, kill yourself, reinforce your feelings of love towards metal/rock, or make you hurt innocent things.

Here are the links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruTqtbiLNAU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMdAbLVdx5U


If you have the balls to make it through the end of this task, I will be more than happy to call you a God.




Tolerance to Shit Game

Easy Mode: 10 seconds.
Normal Mode: 20 seconds.
Hard Mode: 40 seconds.
Extreme Mode: 1 minute, 30 seconds.
"I've had a lobotomy" Mode: 2 minutes.
GOD MODE: Watch that entire fucking video.

You only have to do this for ONE video. Making you watch both would just be mean. You must watch the video and listen simultaneously. Listening with your eyes closed is an instant disqualification.

Good luck you brave motherfuckers.

I've Come to a Conclusion About Teenage Girls (People Make Me Rage)

Ever wonder why teenage girls like Edward Cullen, 95 pound emo guys and highschool football players with the brain power of a shoe? If you have, kudos to you. You're probably not a dumbass.


Question Time


Q - Why do girls like Edward Cullen?

A - Stupidity. Robert Pattinson looks like he's stoned 24/7 and the only thing that works in his favour, is that he plays a character that may seem perfect in a book. Basically people read the stupid book Twilight, get a vag-boner and fall in love with that vampire doucher. Sketchy actor plays said vampire, and makes Miley Cyrus fans wet.


Q - Why do girls like emo/scene guys?

A - I have the theory that girls view them as lifelike dolls. You can put anything on them, and make them look like an asshole, and they won't care at all. As long as they can brood, listen to shitty bands (All Time Low, Thrice, etc.,) and take up bullshit causes like The Emo College Fund, Slit Wrists for Scabies or Silent Screams of the Socially Retarded.

God, I fucking hate you. Fuck the hipsters too.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that people who necessarily look like "emos/scenefucks," are dipshits, it's the one's who try to act like they're above everyone, act like total morons around their peers, brood over how they got the 8GB iPhone instead of the 16GB iPhone ("fuck you mom!,") or they "know the truth," or some other dumbass line like that.


Q - Why do girls go for stupid guys?

A - They like people on the same intellectual platform as them... Calm the fuck down. I'm joking. Honestly though, I think that they like stupid guys for the same reason we all like puppies. They're simple and they make us feel better about ourselves.


This post believe it or not, wasn't inspired by any kind of traumatizing event, where I was spurned or otherwise rejected. In fact, it's just a simple case of my bullshit detector doing cartwheels. It is my only wish that people would wake the fuck up. Stop acting like a prick, and stop trying to impress people. You look like an asshole.

And to those of you who might think that I'm simply posting this to get some kind of a reaction... you're right. I hope to God, that someone provides me with the answers to the aforementioned questions.

Also, I found this to be quite lulzy. Enjoy.

Combat Arms

Since I'm bored, and it's a refreshingly cold for a day in late August, I've decided to blog once again... even though I'm well aware that this will only ever see my eyes most likely.

If you're too "cool," to read something about video games... shut the fuck up, and keep reading anyways.

Combat Arms, is a pretty popular, and relatively new first person shooter (FPS,) from Nexon Inc. It's supposed to be centred around teamwork, although there are people like me who like to destroy that, by going on massive killing sprees occasionally.

There are several different types of game modes that all include killing someone. Obvious right? Right. The most popular mode is Elimination. In this mode, there are two opposing teams, which range from one, to eight players per side. The goal is to be the team to reach the predetermined amount of kills. The mode is great, because it shows where the skilled players really are. Usually a very good player on a bad team, can still lay down some punishment while doing it seemingly by themselves.

Like other FPS', Combat Arms has a wide variety of weapon classes to choose from.

Assault Rifles (AK47, M16, etc.)

Submachine Guns (P90, MP5, etc.)

Sniper Rifles (SR25, M24, etc.)

Shotguns (Saiga 20K, Double Barrel Shotgun, etc.)

Pistols (Desert Eagle, Anaconda, etc.)

Machine Guns (MINIMI, K3, etc.)

Melee weapons (Standard Combat Knife, Sickle, etc.)

Explosives (Mines, M67 Grenade, etc.)

To add to the vast variety of thing that Combat Arms has to offer, are the people. There are many types of people who populate the game. Here they are, with descriptions beside them.

Average Player (There for a good time, maybe cracks a joke or two.)

Hackusation Specialists ("Omg, aimbot, chammer, HACKER!!!") Their average scores are usually around, two kills and fifteen deaths.

Actual Hackers ("lol, lol, lol, I'm awesome.) Then they get a headshot with a knife... from across the map...

Racist twelve year olds from somewhere in the Southern United States...

Good players (Lie low, and own everyone. Often accused of hacking.)

Mexicans (... "que?")

Essentially, it's a very solid game. It's free and is constantly evolving. It also has an integrated clan system, so you can play with friends, against others for a more serious type of competition. You can always check your stats, and look for news at:

http://combatarms.nexon.net/

So if you like games similar to Crossfire or Call of Duty, and are looking for something a little different, try this game out.

O HAI, THNX FUR R3ADING. K BAI!

Wow isn't that title just annoying and stupid?

Wait, I'll answer. Of course it's stupid. It's the stupid art of trying to be ironically bad at spelling...

It's also stupid because the people who would write that title (and take it seriously of course,) are stupid. These are the people who drop our IQ's and will eventually make us want to kill ourselves.

Great you're still reading. K THNX!

Anyways... if you haven't figured it out yet, let me introduce you to emo's. Yes... emo's. Now as you might know, I'm not one to EVER make fun of anyone, or call someone stupid... nah but seriously, the majority of people who consider themselves to be an "emo," or as being "scene," are usually from the cosey world of suburbia and most likely watch too many MTV specials.



Don't you just feel really bad for that guy in the picture? Yeah you do... because you're a pussy. Just look at. Take away the skinny jeans and the pair of VANS, and you've essentially got yourself a Daniel Radcliff prototype. See it's simple bullshit like that, which makes people think that they're something that they are just not. Just because you dress like you're sad and depressed, doesn't mean that you are. That's something you need to FEEL.

Oh but wait a minute. Aren't emos known to be sensitive and write deep poetry?

Well yeah, if you consider poetry to be shit about how mommy wouldn't buy you a pony when you were six and how that act of "abandonment," has caused you to feel unloved. If this is considered to be real life drama, then I have a sad story about how I nearly failed art in the seventh grade because I thought the class was stupid and pointless. That tear jerker, will be saved for another day though.

Furthermore, you can't consider yourself to be emo just because you listen to My Funeral for a Friend or Thursday, doesn't mean that you're emo. It simply means that you're somewhat tone deaf.

Now on the otherhand, "These Children Who Have it so Rough," do have a few things that are simply, pretty awesome. They have the awesome quality of having NO SHAME WHATSOEVER.

Think about it...

They cry for no apparent reason.
They dress all alike, in an attempt to be nonconformists.
The guys wear eyeliner.
Some of the girls look like guys... on purpose.
They write things LKE THY FAIL3D THRD GRAD... again, on purpose.

They sound like attention whores, don't they? Again, I'll answer because you're too slow. Yes, yes they sound like attention whores.

The second thing that they have... are hot emo girls.



Yeah, I know right. I would too.

Seriously though, maybe it's like a side affect from too many My Chemical Romance concerts, but a lot of emo/scene chicks are hot. What's great about this, is that their emo guy friends are usually too involved in themselves to notice. If you've got any common sense at all, you'll realize that this is great for the rest of us who haven't spent too much time in front of our microwaves.

Now before I end this I just want to clear the air about my rant. I understand if you are sad and depressed because life has been a bitch to you so far. Whether this means your dad drinks too much, or your friends are never there for you or how the doctor fucked up your circumcision, dress in black and cutting yourselves won't make it go away. You just look like a tool.

Shut the fuck up and get a job if you feel worthless.

Feel better? If not, look at that second picture for about four seconds. Boobs make everything better.

BAI! xXx K THNX!