To Apple With Love

I woke up this morning. It was surprisingly cool outside for a June day. It was comfortable, I fell back asleep quickly. I then awoke again about two hours later. This time however, my neck was in intense fucking pain. It was as if Satan himself had inserted a fiery dick into my spine. In other words, my day wasn't going well.

Being the sly Devil that he is, Satan (do you see what I did there?) decided that he would screw with me just a little bit more. He decided that it would be cool to kick me in the Valerie Bertanelli's once more. See apparently it's cool to hide my precious iPod on me. I know it may sound trivial, but it's my baby. I would protect my sweet iPod with my life. The hunt was on.

As I climbed out of bed with the fury of a thousand Nam vets, I could hear the distinct bark of my neighbours' dog. I was thoroughly unimpressed. However I continued on my quest. I journeyed down the stairs. I looked at the couch in my living room. There was no iPod there. My heart skipped a beat. To the kitchen, I knew where I must go. I opened the fridge. Obviously I wasn't looking for my prized possession, I clearly was thirsty. Orange juice; the drink of Kings.

After my encounter with my citrusy friend, I walked lazily to the family room. There it was, in all of its overpriced glory. My iPod, I had found. I popped in my headphones and started to listen to one of my new favourite bands, Creedence Clearwater Revival. As the sweet melodies filled my ears, a couple of guys who were up to no good, started making trouble in my neighbourhood. I got in one little fight and my mom got scared, she said "you're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air."


PS - June 3rd. Great day.